When reaching a certain stage in their life, usually between the ages of 35 and 55, both men and women experience an emotional instability or imbalance, also known as midlife crisis. During this period, most people start questioning their needs and feelings, which leads them to sometimes making drastic changes regarding their lifestyle. Marriage also suffers great harm because of the indecision, lack of contentment and new behavior displayed by one of the partners. There are many signs that give away a spouse’s midlife crisis. These include feelings of depression, the need for change, the intense desire of seeking adventure, indifference towards things that once held great importance, the inability of making decisions, doubts regarding the marriage, thoughts about starting a new passionate relationship. Once you notice these obvious signs, the next step that you need to do is be there for your husband or wife.
What you can do to support your spouse
If you want to save your marriage, you should not let midlife crisis affect it in any way meaning that you have to prove your spouse that you are there for him or her, regardless of the situation. In times of depression, you might notice that your spouse neglects his work, friends and even family. You need to be patient and keep in mind that this period will not last forever. Things will get better once your loving partner returns. When your spouse expresses the need of experiencing something new, make sure that you have plenty of ideas at hand. For instance, you can suggest a road trip or vacation, activities that spark interest and increase adrenaline levels. The main goal is to keep him or her busy, besides showing your support. Do not let major decisions like quitting his or her job surprise you. It is normal for people going through a midlife crisis. After quitting their job, some of them want to go back to school and study something unusual. Concerning intimacy, showing interest in poly relationships is possible. You might even have the sensation that you no longer recognize your own spouse.
Ask yourself the following question: is our marriage worth saving?
Indeed, this type of situation can prove to be extremely challenging for any couple. Even if you spent most of your life together, now you might consider the possibility of separating. Finding the motivation of keep fighting is difficult, but you need to evaluate your marriage and decide if it is worth the effort. Otherwise, you will eventually regret throwing the towel with so much ease. Of course, at some point you will experience anger, frustration and tiredness because you cannot maintain an objective perspective taking into account the level of emotional involvement. However, the most important things that you need to keep in mind is that as long as your spouse does not act deliberately at the expense of your marriage, it means that he definitely want to continue spending his life next to you. Midlife crisis is just a phase that you both need to overcome.